I was out for a meal with my boss the other evening and we were chatting.
He asked if I planned on getting back into my boxing?
I laughed! I barely have the energy to walk to the bus stop and back every day!
I was telling hubby how funny I found this, and he pointed out that I don’t actually tell anyone how bad I am, so how is the boss supposed to know!
He’s got a point! So here goes! This is how my normal day goes!
I get up and I’m tired, not just normal tired, but completely and utterly. I’m in pain, my hips hurt, my knees hurt, I’ve slept, but a disturbed sleep, as when I turn over or move, something hurts and wakes me up!
I normally take pain killers with the rest of my daily tablets, just to ease the pain enough to get me ready.
Most days I get the bus outside ours, as the 15 minute walk to the main bus stop wears me out. But if it can’t be helped, if I have to go in early, by the time I finish the walk, I’m melting, and tired, and feel sick.
The next thirty minutes bus ride are spent drinking water and cooling down before getting to work.
During the day, I seize up from sitting, and have to get up to walk.
Or my brain stops working – the brain fog – and I have to sit quietly and try to focus, just to remember what I was doing before I had my blank.
I don’t have the energy to walk into town at lunch now, and try to avoid the heat as much as possible anyway, as that just floors me.
Then I’ve got to do the home journey! Most evenings by the time I get home, I want to cry I’m hurting so much, I have to go up the stairs on all 4’s as my knees haven’t got the strength to get me up them.
I sit and eat my meal, and am normally in bed by 9pm, all ready to start again the following day.
By the end of the week I’m beat.
My weekends are spent relaxing, I will get the bus up to our local shops for some bits, but I’ve had the online shop delivered with the majority of the shopping.
On top of this, I have my dizzy spells, and migraines, and horrific mood swings, with depression.
And that’s about it. That’s my life now.
Not much of one, but I try and make the most of it. I’m lucky as most of the time I’m happy as long as I’m with my hubby, but sometimes it’s frustrating.
This weekend I’d wanted to go out for a while, just to our local beach, but I’d had a bad week, so didn’t have the energy, and had a bit of an upset tummy.
I am hoping that it gets better, I’m hoping as I lose weight with eating healthily, I will get a bit more energy, and possibly start walking more.
And my ultimate goal is to get back to running, but I think that’s a long way off yet.
In the meantime – I will keep going, keep quiet, and remain my normal, happy self, keeping my meltdowns till I’m home.